“No, but I’ve moved past being a rape victim. I’ll never forget that it happened, and it will affect me for the rest of my life. But it doesn’t define who I am, well, at least not since I met you. When I talked to Doctor Mercer about having sex with you before we did it the first time, she was concerned about how the rape would affect my sex life. I remember her worrying a bit about me wanting to degrade myself because I was somehow unclean or unworthy. I had some real issues with viewing myself as sexually desirable instead of as damaged goods.“In a way, it was like Tracey’s belief that no guy would ever want her. I was afraid that no guy would ever want me because I had been raped and gotten pregnant and had an abortion. But you never looked at me as damaged goods. You taught me that I was a sexy, desirable girl. You prove it every time you make love with me. You have no idea how much it meant to me when you told me that you felt that you were my first. At first I couldn’t see how. "And thanks for your help."Lewis and Alyssa hung up. She walked into the living room where Lewis had been on the phone. "Promise me you won't go looking for Sanders." Lewis tried to downplay what he'd said. "Promise me," Alyssa demanded.Smiling, he pulled Alyssa in for a hug. He kissed her and said, "Okay, I promise." Under his breath he added, "Not right now anyway. But if I run into Mr. Jake Sanders in town, his ass is mine." We need to do something about the day to day running of Granddad's ranch," Alyssa said. Smiling she added, "Guess I should say James' ranch shouldn't I?"Lewis was lost in thought for a couple of minutes. "You know, Jerry Pace is just the man to run the place." Yeah, Jerry's the right choice, if he wants the job," Alyssa said. "He's been working there for over seven years now." Closer to nine," Lewis responded.Jerry Pace was the nephew of the first quests at Eagle's Nest when they started the dude ranch. He'd shown a talent for being a "cowboy" and Lewis had.
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